in good companywell, if you've realized that i'm not that same sweetheart boy you fell in love so many years ago (in fact i bare almost zero resemblance,) then i guess by now you realize i'm not even the same guy you fell on top of at that party at your acquaintance's apartment. if you're inclined towards drunken stupor, i'm sorely lacking in that department (i prefer drunk & sketchy or sauced and over-honest, myself.) i'm not looking for a savior, nor am i excelling in hard-knock-life complaints or comments, i'm just a city boy transplanted to the suburbs with a big vocabulary and a thinning wallet.in good company
but as a girl attached to the da
wtchngthewhtesofyreyes trn redsometimes i can be so fucking james dean it sickens me. i mean my back and brick walls outside of clubs, form right triangles, and there's 180 degrees between what's real and what's desirable, and i can wear my denim and my denial like the must-have accessories for fall, and i have them all, and i can front like i'm a trendsetter but i'd be hard pressed to find a runway that displays my "chic from a shopping mall" self-deprecating brand name bullshit word-hurse. carrying dead languages and dead sparks with girls who fit me the worst. but i keep striking the dead flint like a square peg in a circle, like trying to start fires without fuewtchngthewhtesofyreyes trn red
god's gween earthby my last estimate, there are several thousand entertainers on god's green earth whose only apparent aim is to decrease my self worth, because lately i have so many anxious episodes i could make a series, and so many fits i should be rejoicing in my fitness. and not being sick and wispy. nearly disappearing with every piece of me i give away for bait and tackle. for bait and switch, for catching backhanded compliments. like "you remind me of a young insert-famous-name-here"... well, why the hell aren't i good enough to be his equal at the age that he's most famous for? if i had to set the record straight, and don't get me wrong, i truly hategod's gween earth
zoom zoomi am as full of resentment as i am devoid of accomplishments. what have i done to deserve nothing? nothing. i just fucking wandered around on the brink of existence. too honest, too stupid, too smart, not painless enough. this mindset buzzes like a hornet's nest built up in my heart and set loose on my body's best defenses. and they are storming the walls now. it stings like a letdown. she'll never love you again, now. i'll never be anything, how could i ever even pretend that i would be. i'm just stupid kid with a pen and a diary. what a waste of oxygen and what a loss of a lifetime. i could've done better in school, but i was just bending tzoom zoom
The favorite, well, I'm not sure. I guess something struck a chord.
No, it's not rude at all.
Yours are equally awesome.
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"Singing is like a celebration of oxygen."
-Bjork
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ooh la la
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